Skip to main content

Find Your True Love Now - Part 1

I feel like writing about relationships right now - maybe it's the approach of Valentines Day. Who knows but bear with me. These next few blogs will have a thread to them. Hang on. The woods are snowy and my mountain bike is dangling from the rafters. What else is there to write about besides?

I have been checking out my oldest son Nick's blog (nickgilroy.com) and am in awe and amazement that he writes about finding the woman of his Dreams. He is so young and has yet to experience loves longing, or loves heartbreak. If I had my way he never would have to go through heartbreak like his old man did (multiple times mind you). If I had my way he would discover the brilliance of his soul mate his first time up to bat. He would find that "fully shining woman" in some serendipitous meeting, some chance encounter and fall totally and permanently in Love. Maybe it's impossible, I don't know. Maybe it will happen for Nick. God knows for me it took half my life to get it right. Don't get me wrong. I've loved many women, even married a few, and felt that soul connection often throughout my life. But it wasn't until I met Meghan that I knew completely and without a doubt I had found the "woman of my dreams". Let me share a story. Nick figures very prominently in this fairy tale...

About nine years ago I was recovering from yet another round of heartbreak, and consequently raising Nick on my own. His best friend Speed was basically living with us and we were house sitting for some friends and totally living the boys life. I had started dating again and was on the lookout for someone to connect with, be in relationship with, and to help my broken heart mend. I know, bad strategy, but I'm a slow learner. Anyway one night Nick and Speed and I were sitting around the dinner table finishing up when my computer alerted me to an incoming email. I got up and went to my office in the next room and checked it. It was from this woman in NYC I planned to spend a weekend with. We had set it up that I would stay with her at her apartment on the upper East side. Well her email asked where I was going to stay during my visit. I couldn't believe she was doing that at the last minute after inviting me to stay with her and I returned to the table mumbling about how fickle women can be. Nick (being sensitive to his Dad's moods) asked what was wrong. I said something like, "I just don't get women...". The words that I'm about to write are exactly what came out of his 10 year old mouth.

"Dad it's like this: you meet these women, and go out for awhile. Then you asked them to marry you. And it's fine for awhile and then it doesn't work out and then you get sad. Why not have fun and play around until you meet that fully shining women. Then you will know she is the one".

I was blown away and sat stunned for a minute. I looked over at Speed and his mouth was open too. Nick was just looking at me kinda like Yoda looked at Luke in the swamp. I jumped up from the table knocking over the chair and ran to my computer and wrote down what Nick said.

I didn't really need to write it down though because I will never forget the seed he planted in my brain that day. And as I sit here writing this I am filled with wonder and awe because I am married to that "fully shining woman" and she is the mother of Bodhi, and a mother to Nick too.

Tomorrow I write about meeting that woman when I least expected it. And in retrospect it was as if our lives were on a crash course - destined to come together and live like Love was all that mattered...

May all of you reading this have found, or may find, your true love now.

Peace.

J

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Losing His Hero

Today in my morning meditation I was strongly feeling my middle brother David who passed away almost two months ago on November 20, 2023. He was 71 years old. A bit of preface here: He also was my abuser growing up (to clarify: emotional and physical, not sexual) and although I had reconciled those experiences through my own inner trauma work we never spoke directly about that time in our lives. We were never very close in our young adulthood although he was very generous when I moved to Encinitas CA to participate in don Miguel Ruiz’s Dreaming School in 2002. He and his wife Carol lived two towns over in Solana Beach. We interacted quite a bit sharing meals and dog walks on the beach and David took a real interest in my son Nick who was 12 at the time. It wasn’t until 20 years later that I became fully aware to the degree of harm I experienced at the hands of my brother while involved in some somatic therapy around my CPTSD diagnosis. I was becoming repeatedly trigg

Waking Up with the What Ifs

Apparently last night I had been dreaming of a life I left behind 11 years ago.  Snippets of memory like peering through a gauzy veil, and scenes vaguely reminiscent of my life as a builder in a small coastal town north of Boston. I woke up with the What Ifs. You know how dreams are: like your eyes can’t completely focus, situations that are seemingly disconnected but maybe not, faces you know but can’t place, yet the feeling in the dream is quite real. I was back in Old Town and trying to figure out why the house I was in was unfinished. There was a meeting to be had there, but it was just me. I walked down a cobbled street to what I figured to be the office of the architect and it was a room of all glass and about 10 people seated around a glass table. I tried to get the attention of the man who was the architect on this particular job without disrupting the meeting. He looked like a friend who wasn’t an architect but a realtor and a neighbor.  I wondered how he switched care

Mindset Like a Dog

This morning after getting the kids off to school I decided to take my dogs for a longer than usual hike on our local mountain. I took a couple big swigs of water, layered up, added hat and gloves, and headed out the gate. The dogs knew what was up and bounced around me, excited and eager for whatever lay ahead. Yet every time they see me putting on my boots it’s like they have never been walked before. Their excitement is fresh. Every day. How is it that they have no idea how long or short I am going to walk them, yet they are always down to walk? I never have to prod them out of their lethargy.  Rain, snow, or sun, they are ready.  Anytime. This got me to wondering what if I adopted this dog mindset? What exactly would that feel like? ******* Recently I’ve felt flat. Not super inspired.  I’m attempting to increase my client base as a Mindset Coach and honestly renovating a 200-year-old house like in my former life feels markedly easier than landing new clients.   It’s the